Our Coaching Relationship
Coaching
is a powerful, professional alliance focused on your personal
and professional development. The content of all sessions is strictly
confidential. (If you are an organizational client with a report-out
requirement, we can address this by having you report out, or
by reaching agreement together on the content of the report before
I report out.)
Typically,
a relationship begins with an exploratory session, through which
we both determine whether the relationship is a good fit. This
session, as with all others, can occur by phone or in person.
After
the exploratory session, if we commit to work together, the next
step is a more thorough assessment process. (See resource section
to download intake materials.) For organizational clients, this
process usually includes gathering available professional feedback
and gaining more clarity on the organization's agenda for the
coaching relationship.
You then
do some big picture reflection in preparation for the foundation
session which follows. After the foundation session, our coaching
relationship may last from several months to several years. While
many clients utilize shorter, more frequent coaching sessions
to help them stay on track, (such as 30 minutes each week), others
do best with more in-depth work on a less frequent basis.
The Foundation Session
In this
extended session (lasting 2 - 3 hours), we build our coaching
relationship – one that requires trust, courage, and honesty
on both sides. We also bring laser focus to your agenda. What's
most important? Where are you stuck? What skills do you need?
What comes first? How will we know when we're done? Finally, we
agree on the frequency, length, and location of future sessions.
You'll
leave this session with clear objectives, tools, and momentum.
Tools may include questions for reflection; daily habits to strengthen
or change; specific, time-bound projects to complete; or external
resources to access. We'll also address specific structures to
help support success.
While
this possible list may sound daunting, remember that you choose
each of these items, with guidance from me, and that we run them
through a commitment lens prior making final, prioritized choices.
(The last thing anybody needs is more low-commitment items on
their action list!) Then, in between sessions, the you are responsible
for following through on your choices, and keeping an open, observant
stance along the way.
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Regular Coaching
Sessions
Most
on-going sessions share a basic four-step flow:
1. How Are You – Really?
2. Progress Check.
What have you accomplished since our last session? What have you
noticed? What have you learned? What has unfolded that will effect
today's agenda, and/or your long-term agenda?
3. Work for Today:
What is your agenda? Sometimes we'll focus on long-range, big-picture
questions, and sometimes we'll wrestle with immediate challenges.
While the choice of each session's agenda is yours, part of my
job is to help you keep the wide, long view that brought you to
coaching in the first place.
4. What's Next?
What will you focus on before our next session? You might choose
questions for reflection, action items (projects), habits to initiate
or strengthen, focuses to hold, or outside resources (such as
reading, or key conversations) to utilize. We create a series
of possibilities together: I frequently make suggestions, but
the ultimate commitment to specific choices is up to you.
Making It Great:
How To Get The Most Out Of Coaching
While
this answer will be as unique as you are, there are some patterns
that hold true for enough clients to make them worth sharing:
- Be truly bold in framing the goals that bring
you to coaching.
- Track your goals and commitments.
- Stand in a place of adventure.
- Become a student of your own life. Develop your
ability to observe yourself with compassion, and without blame.
- Be willing to "be lost" so you can discover new
perspectives and new energy.
- Distill essence from experience. Reflect on your
experience so that you can capture the learning that emerges along
the way.
- Be willing to change course as new learning emerges.
- If you want help, ask.
- Decide ahead of time: "What do I want to get
out of my session today?"
- Fax, e-mail, or call in a quick report and/or
agenda before each session. Use the four-step outline, above,
or create a different format that best serves you.
- Always remember that you're in the driver's seat.
The idea that "a complaint is often an unexpressed request" is
especially true in our coach/client relationships!
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